Tuesday, February 16, 2016

There had better be school tomorrow.

I'm in the kitchen, with dinner simmering, and taking a few minutes to breathe while things finish cooking. The cutting board and knife are in the dishwasher, the dishwasher is running, and my hands are clean. I figured I had about five minutes to read before dinner was ready.

Silly me.

"Mommy," Oldest said in most serious tones, "Youngest mixed water and Play-Doh and made a potion again. And she put it under her bed."

I closed my eyes briefly and counted silently to five. "Youngest!" When she appeared in the kitchen, I asked (as calmly as I could), "Did you mix water and Play-Doh again?"

"Yes," Youngest muttered, barely moving her lips.

"Go get it," I ordered firmly.

She headed upstairs and I tried to not scream. This is not the first time we've had this issue. Or the second. Or the fifth. There's a water ban for the twins' bedroom for a reason.

Oldest piped up again. "She also put in syrup."

I felt my eyes bug out.

Medium, not wanting to be left out, added, "And water from this—" she hefted the Kitty Discipline squirt bottle—"and some of this—" oh, great, the diluted conditioner for brushing out hair. Medium walked over to the refrigerator and opened the door, tugging on the pitcher of Kool Aid I'd made earlier this afternoon. "And some of the Mixed Berry Kool Aid."

Well. That's quite a potion. Youngest has never used quite so many ingredients before.

Youngest returned to the kitchen and handed me the generic Play-Doh container. I opened it—huh, pink—and cautiously gave it a sniff. Definite notes of syrup and mixed berry. "Want to tell me what else you put in here besides water?"

I watched the wheels turn as Youngest scrambled to come up with answers that wouldn't get her in trouble. Well, in more trouble.

"You might as well tell me the truth. I already know."

"Syrup. And Mixed Berry Kool Aid."

I held up the squirt bottle of diluted conditioner. "This?"

She nodded morosely.

"And water from here?"

Another nod.

"Syrup is food, and the Kool Aid is for drinking! These are not toys!" I dumped the extra fluid down the sink and pitched the contaminated Play-Doh into the trash can, and then confiscated any other Play-Doh in the twins' room, with apologies to Middle. "I'm going to have to talk with Daddy about how to deal with this, because whatever we have come up with in the past has not discouraged you from continuing to do this."

I was able to determine that Youngest was attempting to make a pretend potion. I wasn't able to determine just what she was pretending her pretend potion would do.

I am, however, now insanely curious. What was this magical concoction going to accomplish?

I'm also pretty sure there's something wrong with me.

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