You know that list of things every kid swears he'll NEVER say to his children? Yeah, this isn't that list. This is the "I can't believe I actually said this" list. I'm sure I'll be adding more to this....
"NO! You may NOT 'drive the car' with the floor lamp!"
"No no no no no! Do NOT sit in the cats' water dish! That is NOT a potty!"
"Stop smiling. I don't like it when you smile when I'm touching you there." (Dan, to the youngest niece, as he was changing her diaper.)
"I will NOT kiss your boogie."
"Do NOT stand on the horse!"
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If you are rude, spiteful, or just plain mean, there will be a $10 charge just for putting up with you.
Please be nice.