Mid-October 2022
I received a call on my cell phone while at work, and I picked it up--unusual; I mostly let my voicemail pick up because I'm, y'know, at work. They can leave me a message. I'm dealing with patients and doing my job. But my mom has been in the hospital and her hospitalist has been calling me daily. I thought that's who I was getting on the other end of the line.
Not even close.
A very nice lady introduced herself as working for the Court and asked if I had a few minutes to talk about my husband. She was working on the Pre-Sentence Report and had some questions.
I called to my partner that I was going to be a few minutes and took the call upstairs.
The lady asked me to confirm Hubby's date and place of birth (after twenty-six years of marriage, I ought to know those), how many siblings he had, where he grew up, and what kind of childhood he had. She also wanted to know if Hubby had ever been physically or sexually abused. Not to my knowledge, I said. He'd never mentioned anything of the kind. I also confirmed when and where we married and that, yes, I was seeking a divorce neither of us wanted but was the best course of action, based on his grooming activities. No, I said, I had no idea when those began, but law enforcement, social services, and the FBI were aware of his behavior. Middle had by then undergone three forensic interviews, as more and more information came out.
Yes, we have children: four of them. Three adopted, fourth of the heart. It works. Please don't ask me to explain that further.
No, I have no idea why he did these terrible things. Increased levels of addiction always wanting more? That's all I've got.
Her final question was to ask if there was anything I wanted to share with the Court. What a loaded question. I settled on saying that the children he violated deserve justice. So do his own children. I want justice for them all. This is not the Hubby I married. I don't know who this Hubby is.
The conversation left me off-kilter for the rest of the day.
I had figured, with the sentencing report due by the 19th or whatever of October, that sentencing wouldn't be far behind, and we could close this chapter of our lives.
I was wrong. It was still many months away.
January 31, 2023
I was checking PACER, just for kicks. You know, to see if anything new had popped up since the last time I was there.
And there it was.
Sentencing Hearing.
I opened the file and carefully read the brief information.
They'd set a date: April 26, 2023, at 9:30 a.m. at the Federal Courthouse in BigTown, courtroom to be determined.
I blinked. My eyes did not deceive me. That really said April 26, 2023--exactly two years to the day of his arrest. Huh.
I waffled for the longest time on whether or not to attend the hearing. On the one hand, it was going to tear me to pieces to watch him come in, dressed in prison garb, and see him be sentenced. The whole thing just screamed DIFFICULT. On the other hand...I really wanted to see and hear for myself what would actually take place in the courtroom. I wanted to know if he was going to try to blame me for his crimes.
In the end, I went. But I didn't go alone.
