There is wailing and gnashing of teeth. And stomping.

The last few days have been really busy.

Medium has been complaining in the last month or so that she "can't" read. Well, that's not true. She can. She's the best reader of all three Fries. It didn't take much questioning to realize that it's not that she is incapable of reading...it's that she can't see well enough to read.

We saw her pediatric ophthalmologist on Wednesday afternoon. It's an hour and a half drive.(Astonishingly, pediatric ophthalmologists are not everywhere, especially in towns of only about 5500.)

Medium

Medium has a condition called exotropia, which is especially prominent in her left eye (less so in her right), which worsens when she's tired or overwhelmed. Her rather sudden nearsightedness—from 20/20 in both eyes back in February or March, at her annual exam, to 20/50 and 20/60 now—has made the exotropia worse. She's having to expend way more energy to read and force her eyes to focus even more. So, her ocular muscles are getting tired a lot faster. The exotropia is why we sought out a pediatric ophthalmologist in the first place.

Her specialist explained that she's just barely nearsighted, but she's going to give her a slightly stronger glasses prescription to help force her eyes to align better. Gotcha.

So after running back to back to back on Wednesday for Medium's appointment, Large Fry's open house at the Sub-Middle School, and 2nd-grade orientations (the twins are in separate classes this year), yesterday we took the Fries for their before-school haircuts. (And one for Hubby, too.)

After lunch, we stopped off at my eye doctor's. We could fill Medium's glasses prescription there.

Large

As I said, it's been busy...and we have my eye doctor's appointment today, plus shopping for new sneakers for the kids.

I know they're subconsciously worried about school.

But things have gotten out of hand lately, and I was determine to nip any unpleasantness in the bud this morning.

They all did their chores before I would let them watch tv or play on the computer or play outside. Medium got settled on the computer for her allotted time, and Large and Small decided to watch tv.

About forty minutes ago, I heard Small screeching at her sister: "Gimme the clicker!" She hollered that at least five times. Then I heard Large: "I'm not done yet!"

I shouted for both of them to come to me.

Small

When I asked why they were screaming at each other, Large launched into an explanation, blaming Small, that would have made a politician proud of her verbal evasive maneuvers, had I not stopped her and reiterated my question. The truth came out: it was Small's turn to pick, but Large didn't want to give up control of the clicker, so she had started whatever program they'd been watching on Netflix a second time, so she could go through the credits and stop, so the next time they watch it, they wouldn't "have to watch them."

I told them to go turn off the tv.

By this time, Medium's computer time was up. She wanted to know if she could watch tv. Yes, I said. She could...but Small and Large could not.

"So it's Amish Summer?" Large asked.

"For you and Small, yes."

Large stormed upstairs, shut herself in her room, and wailed.

"Can I go play outside?" Small asked.

"Yes. But you have to stay in our yard, and you can't go next door." If she can't be nice to her sister, I'm not going to trust her to be nice to her friends.

About then, I heard stomping and thrashing coming from Large's room.

I called her to the stairs. "Why are you behaving like this?"

"Because it's Amish Summer for Small and me!" she wailed.

"Do you know why?"

She shook her head. I called Small to join us.

In short order, I explained why they had lost privileges: Large had deliberately kept the clicker from Small when it was Small's turn to choose, and then she'd screamed at Small. Small should have asked Large nicely for the clicker, rather than demanding it at the top of her lungs multiple times. Small should have listened when Large explained what she was doing...but Large, really, credits are not that long, and Large should not have set the show up to skip the credits just to keep clicker possession longer. The end.

Large went back to her room then, and Small went outside.

I think Large has stopped sniffling.

I am not looking forward to shoe shopping this afternoon, that's for sure. I hope lunch helps.

The Countdown Has Begun

This morning, Hubby, the Fries, and I all journeyed over to the Sub-Middle School.

Large Fry starts fourth grade there in exactly a week, and she was very scared about having a new school. Fortunately for all of us, one of the ladies in our church, Ms. Vee, teaches at the SMS, and had agreed to give us an abbreviated tour ahead of time. Despite the unscheduled waxing of the lobby floors today, we were still able to get in and look around.

Ms. Vee led us straight to the Red hall, which is where Large's classrooms will be. Large will even get a locker this year. She'll switch between two classrooms, which are right next door to each other.

The school building itself is fairly new. The gymnasium is full-sized and HUGE. Ms. Vee showed us where the art room and computer lab were, as well as the playground area. She explained that, for the first couple of days, all the fourth graders are funneled into the cafeteria as they arrive, and the teachers will lead them back to their classrooms. The end-of-the-day procedures will remain the same all year: walkers and parent pick-up students are released first, then the first group of bus students, and then the last group of bus students. Any students riding buses will go to either the cafeteria or the gym, and find their bus number, and then they're dismissed by buses (this way nobody misses the bus). Large will be riding the bus this year for the first time since first grade.

Large seemed much more at ease after our tour, even though we couldn't see all of the school because of the floor maintenance.

I am feeling better about her new school, but still feeling weird about all this. I don't know that I'm ready for her to be in fourth grade. Hubby laughed at me when we first arrived, because I looked so glum and bereft as I got out of the van.

I'm not so sure I'm ready for the twins to be in second grade, either. They are in different classes this year...another first. Medium has Mrs. Greek, and Small has Large's second-grade teacher.

Heaven help me. They keep growing up.

Migraine Salute. But now with hilarity!

I wasn't feeling well this morning (a holdover from not feeling well Friday night and all day yesterday), so I skipped church this morning. Since PeeJay is on vacation this week, and Hubby has to preach, I knew it meant the entire female Fry & Co. contingent would be staying home.

I moseyed downstairs in search of something to eat that actually sounded good. I was finally sitting down to eat, and had the kids doing the chores they were supposed to do yesterday, when Large Fry popped into the room.

Wearing, I should point out, a pink shirt with little brown terriers scattered all over it, heavy cotton winter stockings, and a pink tutu with large, shiny sequins. Oh, and white socks with orange cuffs. She's being a ballerina today.

"Mommy, I found a whisker..." She held up a short, coal-black whisker. Koa's. (She's the only one with all-black whiskers.)

"Then throw it away," I instructed. Really, I thought. Do I need to be consulted for this?

"Oh." Large sounded a big dejected. "I thought we could use it for the eye things."

She left the room as I closed my eyes and tried to avoid a literal facepalm.

Large had wanted to use Koa's shed whisker as a false eyelash.

Just now...

Small Fry: I want to jump on Daddy, like a bounce house!

Hubby: Nooo!

Gee, it's a shame we didn't have boys. Hubby has no one to wrestle with...

Overheard

Medium came in to our room in the wee hours of the morning, having had a bad dream and needing the security of sleeping with us. I told her to climb on up, and sleepily noted later that Hubby had wrapped his arm around her as they slept (awww).

This morning, Hubby got a call from the church secretary that the internet was out at the office (most likely due to a power outage during last night's storm). He promised he'd be right in. Medium quickly sprawled all over Hubby's side of the bed. He must have given her a look, because this conversation followed...

Medium: My bed!

Hubby: Your bed?

Medium (triumphantly): MY bed!

Hubby: You're crazy!

Medium: You got that right!

Hubby (chuckling): Put that in your blog and smoke it.

Me (sleepily): Oh, yes.

Tonight, on "Excuse Theater"...

...Small Fry collapses in a tearburst that's Oscar-worthy!

Scene: Den, where I am sitting in front of my laptop, when Small returns from the potty.

Small: Where's Medium Fry?

Me: Getting ready for bed, which is what you need to do.

Small: But I was going to sing another song!

Me: You told me you wanted to sing one song. You sang one song.

Small: I wanted to sing three songs!

Me [firmly]: You said you wanted to sing one song. You sang one song.

Small [lip quivering]: But that's not what I meant!

Me: I can't just know what you meant. I have to go by what you said. You said one song. You sang one song. And now it's after 8:00, so you have to go get ready for bed.

Small teared up and slunk out of the room and went whimpering up the stairs.


It's clear that she especially is suffering from lingering overtiredness after our vacation to Florida last week. I insisted on naps earlier today for the twins, but she's still crabby. I can hear her shouting at her sisters upstairs.

I should have imposed an earlier bedtime.

I wish I had a picture...

...but I don't. Because I promised I wouldn't.

Hubby is out of town this week, on his annual summer mission trip with the teens. The Fries and I have thus spent the last several days out at my folks', and came home today. (Our kitty-sitters are also on the mission trip.) Sis and BIL and their kids are in the States right now, also staying with my folks, so it's been cousin insanity and 11 people (more than half of them kids) in my parents' home.

With a few nights away from home, no Hubby, not my own bed, and no Mika to come snuggle with me at night, I haven't slept well. The drive home was tiring, even if it was only an hour.

So I made a decision. I was lifting the Amish Summer tech ban for the afternoon. They've gone mostly without tech since Sunday evening anyway. I needed a nap. I fixed everybody lunch, and sent the kids up to the living room to watch TV while I dozed in the den.

When I woke a little while ago, I figured I still had some time before I needed to tell them to get ready to go so that we can go back to the VBS at a church near Gramma and Poppa's tonight (they've gone the last two nights with Roo and A-man). Large and Medium were watching TV. Small was not.

"Where's Small?" I asked.

"She's upstairs," Medium said.

I followed what I thought was the sound of water being turned on hard and rapidly turned off.

The girls' bathroom. Of course. Which they all know they're not supposed to play in.

I peered into the room and saw no one. "Small?" I asked.

"I'm hiding back here."

I walked to the back of the bathroom, and found her tucked between the toilet and the huge cupboards by the sink.

With her electric Dora toothbrush.

And there's the "water" sound.

She was also holding a black marker cap.

And her eyelids were black.

"Where's the marker?" I demanded. She leaned out and pointed over to the counter between the sinks. I took the cap and put it on the marker. "What's on your finger?"

"Lotion."

I grabbed her toothbrush and studied it. "Is there lotion on your toothbrush?"

"Yes," she mumbled.

"Why?!"

She shrugged her shoulders.

"Well, you've ruined your toothbrush. You know this is not a toy. Why did you put lotion on your toothbrush?"

Another shrug.

"No. That's not good enough. You show me what you were doing with the lotion and your toothbrush."

Small held the toothbrush up to her cheeks, as if she was applying makeup.

I frowned. "I'm very disappointed in your choices."

I walked down the hall to my own bathroom, struggling not to giggle. I sent a text to my best friend and called Small to my bathroom.

She saw my phone. "Don't take a picture," she begged.

"I won't." I ripped open an alcohol prep pad and wiped at her eyelid.

"Will we still get to go to bible school tonight?"

I'd said they had to behave. "Yes."

"What if my sisters see what's left on my eyes?"

I finished with the second prep pad on her other eyelid. "Well, that's the price you pay for drawing on your eyelids with marker."

Her lip quivered, and I tipped her chin up so she could see me. "Are you mad?"

"I'm disappointed," I said. "I love you. Please don't draw on yourself with marker, okay?"

She went back downstairs and watched TV from the stairs.

But, oh, a picture would have made this post perfect!