Thursday, August 9, 2012

The Last Twenty Minutes

I can't make this stuff up.


Small Fry marched determinedly into the den, up to me, and shoved the kids' Dora toothpaste and her toothbrush in my face.

Small:  Help.  There's none left, 'cause my hands awre sweaty.

Her hands were indeed wet, probably from washing them after going potty.  There's still a pink glob of toothpaste easily seen at the end of the nearly-empty tube.

Me:  None left, eh?

Small:  'Cause my hands awre sweaty.


I finished up the bedtime tuck-in routine, which, I swear, has something new added to it every night, and then said goodnight.

And walked out of the twins' room.

And thought that was it.

Silly me.

Medium:  Mama?

Me:  What?

Medium:  Um...I love you.

Me:  I love you too.  Goodnight.

I resumed course to Large's bedroom, and dropped down on her bed next to her.

Large: My name is Pocahontas now.

Me:  Okay, Pocahontasnow, lay down.

Large:  Pocahontas!  Not Pocahontasnow.

Small [from down the hall]:  Mama!  Mama!  MAMA!

Me:  What?!

Small:  I wanna s'eep wif Medium.

I debated saying no.  What I knew for sure was that I didn't want to be screaming this conversation up and down the hall.


Me:  I'll be right there!

So I went back to tucking Large in, calling her Pocahontasnow, making her giggle.


Back down the hall, in the twins' room....

Me:  Okay, what?

Small:  I wanna s'eep wif Medium.

Me:  That's up to her.  Medium, can Small sleep with you?

Medium [pretends to think]:  Yes.  As long as she's quiet.  And doesn't go up on me wif her bum.

Medium flipped over on her belly, shoved her rear end up in the air, and proceeded to bop it around a few times to demonstrate exactly what she meant.

I pressed my lips together as both twins burst out in giggles.  And desperately wished I had video.

And then I actually had to step out in the hall and try to pull myself together, since I was not going to be able to stand there, look at them, and not laugh. 

Ten seconds later, I tried to pull myself together.

No luck.

After another twenty seconds, of me failing to muffle my laughter out in the hall and their out-right glee in the bedroom, I gave up.

Me [still laughing]:  All right, yes, you can sleep with Medium, as long as you behave and you both sleep!

I was still laughing as I got to the stairs.

Medium:  Mommy, don't tell Daddy...

Me:  I can't promise you that one!

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